On dealing with broken hearts, God's Will and perhaps, learning more patience

Yet another long weekend for me which began on Thursday because I had to clear some leave and once again, some unexpected feelings crept up. Oddly, I was disappointed when I thought I was looking forward to Wednesday and Friday, and when I least expect, I was rather pleasantly surprised on a supposed normal me-alone Thursday. There's still quite a packed Saturday and Sunday and I really am trying to learn not to expect anything so I can avoid feeling more disappointed.

Once again, A did tell me he was coming on Wednesday, probably to walk but in the end, he told me he had something on and wasn't able to make it - a little disappointed but at least I got Michael to pace me and 15k was in the bag.

Thursday started off as a day full of appointments but it ended on a pretty good note. Was talking to A in the morning and found out he was on leave too and couldn't say no to lunch (at least I didn't have to hang around with the parents after the lawyer's appointment). Good thing he picked me up at Potong Pasir (although I was surprised he got there so quickly) cos it was terribly humid and I was in desperate need of aircon. To satisfy his craving of prawn mee, I really can't believe he brought me to the Naked Finn at Gillman Barracks! Yes, the prawn mee was rather pricey at $25++ but the seafood there was reputed to be fresh (didn't try the prawns but the fish was really tender). I'm not too huge a fan of hawker/Chinese food but this sort of fusion food did change my preconceptions. Not too bad a choice although the place is rather inaccessible without a car. Thereafter, we went over to Novena and hung around till my speech therapy appointment. Afterwhich, I went for an eyelash touchup and Nike 9k run. I was also mildly surprised I received some lovely matcha chocs from Seoul :)

Friday was (is) Good Friday. Rode with the NUS guys, Sara and Vern and did a 85km West Loop. Feels good to be back on the bike and trying to catch the guys' draft. I must say my bike fitness dropped quite a lot although on flats it was ok but climbing was tough. Hope it gets better soon. Went for Wesley's Good Friday Service - really miss the P&P Service and I regret not going earlier cos there was no seats and we got bumped to the Traditional Service. Well, but at least I made it for a Wesley Service! After service, Debs, myself met up with Naz, Sher and Yew Wee for lunch/catch-up at Haji Lane called "I am" - a halal hipster cafe. Food looked good and pricing was not too bad; just that it was non-airconditioned and the food felt a bit too oily for my liking. Perhaps I still prefer brunch cafes.Well, all went pretty ok until David came and the guys started talking about his girlfriend. It kinda hit me hard; although I was trying to brace myself based on Sher's updates last week on it. I guess, as much as I was happy to see David after some time, learning this was quite damaging to the rest of my day. Speaking of which, I did realise the type of guys I fancied was pretty similar so far, perhaps with the exception of A, that I'll be elaborating later as the thought is unconventional, even as I think about it. It's ok - I just have to harden my heart - AGAIN, and perhaps it won't break; or at least, not as hard.

On the way back, many thoughts ran through my head; hopefully I can actually categorise them well.

1. They said, names have special meanings. Of my 26 years of existence, people often tell me, in Hebrew, Sarah means "princess" and of course, as a kid, it did feel pretty special but now, this thought - why did my parents name me Sarah (or if God was the one that planted it)? Am I stuck to God's plan of making me patient by waiting? After all, in the Bible, Sarah waited 35 (i think) years for a child. This made me feel helpless and somehow I feel troubled by this. God's plan - what is it?

2. The types of guys I dated/fancied changed quite a bit but somehow can be grouped into 2 categories:
-Soccer players
-Cyclists (vs triathletes)

3. The curiosity of A's personal life really bothers me a lot. While I know I shouldn't even be thinking about A AT ALL, I need some distractions from other issues, and this odd relationship between us seem to offer A LOT of reprieve cos it certainly doesn't seem very platonic.

Will elaborate on it again sometime soon.

END 2015 musing

Probably the last post of 2015 - hard to type with 1-2 fingers despite being a lefty.

It had been a wild and scary 4 days from Christmas..I was pretty excited going for my first Rapha Festive500 ride and also meeting E once again. Things happened so quickly that the next moment I was in TTSH and now, I'm out. To be honest, it was really a 3 painful days that seemed rather surreal, till now, I can't really recall the moments in the hospital and also during the crash. Surprisingly, I don't recall any pain, shouts or screams - would that be what happen when one dies? I think I just blacked out. But I really thank God for His Angels that had protected me, that my life was preserved.

The things that happened after, the visits from my beloved friends and even E, was hard to recall. I could only capture some words said to me. But as much as I'm thankful, I'm rather scared what the future holds. Looks-wise, would I still be fit? What about further violent objections from the parents? :((( Dad may be ok but Mum is a definite no-no.

Really want to thank all the visits and get well gifts from the Running Dept Crew-Terry, Nic, Roy, Steven, Ruimei,Tracy,Eve; Declan, Lance, Jiahui, Eugene, Jem, Ken; CA team aunties-Hanniebun, , Jasmine, Candice, Mel, Ivy Wee and Liu, ChuHua, Gillian, Renee, Patrick, May and family; RWG people-Debbie and Jack, Coach Ghana, Jerome, Kevin, Jiarui, Uncle Lim; church friends, Marianne, Aunty Lee Luang, CG friends; Rui Yong, Sweehong, Adriel, Chloe, Yenbin, NUS Aquathlon people (Joshie, JJ, Pam, Sher, YW, Naz, Debs)..and not forgetting E.. Love you guys even though I can't recall much.

Next year 2016 would be a tough one for me..really want to continue to pray for strength.. :((

Year-end Thoughts 2015

A quarter of a century old, interestingly this year has been one of the most memorable one as well. Perhaps not as exciting as my university days but definitely a special year for me. I'll just try to list down as many things I am thankful to God for blessing me at the top of my head that occurred in 2015.

1. Countless of overseas trips - burnt quite a large hole in my pocket but it's the experience that counts.
-Dubai (3 times), Sydney, Hong Kong, Koh Samui, Malaysia

2. Plenty of new guys/friends - I do enjoy getting to know people a lot better

3. Two pacing opportunities - Great Eastern Women's Run 21K and a part of the StanChart Marathon 15K which ended today

4. My longest races - 14K City2Surf, Port Dickson Duathlon (10-60-8), Dubai International Triathlon

5. Supportive friends and coaches who provide countless of encouragement and help - as small as Coach Ghana sending me to AMK to pick up my bike, David coming over to my house to help pack my stuff...etc.

Marching on MARCH - A pretty memorable month for me

March 2014 has been quite an interesting month for me, full of ups and downs - physically and emotionally. And it has been a special month for me too, considering it began with my birthday.

March 1 - Coach David organised a 10km time trial for the aquathlon team - didn't do that well because I haven't been training but at least it didn't get worse from last year. After that we headed over to SPRUCE for a birthday brunch with JJ, Sher, Debs, Chunnie, David and Baris. I was a little disappointed that it wasn't a team thing though :/ Maybe a team time trial on my birthday wasn't that much of a blessing. Nevertheless, it was great spending a special day with people who really mean a lot to me. For dinner, we had it at PITAPAN, where I finally managed to convince the family to try some vegetarian dining options. We had the Mediterranean Platter ($25.90) and Red Shashuka ($11.90).

Team TT on my birthday

Brunch at SPRUCE!!

Blueberry Pancakes - $16.90 but worth the $!

Meet up with the Wuhan group and prebirthday celebration:)

Pretty cosy brunch at SPRUCE

Pitapan Feast! :)

March 8 - Venus Run (refer to my previous post)

March 16 - Metasprint Duathlon 2014 and Coach David's first birthday celebration
My first ever duathlon done! It was really an experience as I couldn't feel my legs after the 10km bike! Gotta improve on my run by doing more brick sessions I guess.. Was really thankful for the first place under Discovery 16-39 as my bike wasn't exactly the strongest component. I was also pretty happy that Jon was first for his category, Dex was second but sad for John that he was 4th :(

After the race, we went to Botanic Gardens Food For Thought for lunch and celebrate Coach's real birthday. As it was raining, as some of them drove, they managed to bring our bikes there without us having to brave the rain :)

Food For Thought lunch :)

March 22 & 23 - SIA Road Race 2014 and Coach David's second birthday celebration
Kebun Baru Road Race

This weekend saw me racing a 4.3km at Bedok Reservoir and a 5km at Kebun Baru, tiring but pretty satisfying weekend. I managed to get a first for the SIA Road Race and a 2nd behind Sumiko for Kebun Baru, which was expected, though my timings were not as good. Well, do a give and take but I have to jot myself out of the comfort zone soon and break my barriers because being stagnant is really bad :/

Coach's birthday celebration on Saturday was pretty cosy because quite a large group came :) Although it was quite a rushed affair because I think everyone had to rush back to study, I hope Coach did enjoy himself at Pita Pan :)

Prize presentation at Kebun Baru

With Ghana, Mr Tan Pee Teck & Mr Goh Choon Phong

RWG group

Happy Birthday Coach David :))

March 30 - NUS Biathlon 2014

Back to not racing under Team NUS :( It helped that my race wasn't as early but still it was uncomfortably hot when my wave started at 945am. I wanted to reach earlier to watch the rest race but somehow that didn't happen and by the time I had arrived, the girls were in the midst of running and the guys were done. Somehow I feel that this year, the team was not as close, also because the Jons & Justin had WUT training after their race. Anyways, i was pretty stressed, having to race Shuwie and this Japanese triathlete in the Open Category, plus one Caucasian girl. Although my swim had improved to a 15:22, it wasn't enough to get me a podium :(. I was pretty disappointed but oh wells, time to buck up. John and Debs weren't here, or else the experience might have been more interesting. Anne did well in her novice category though, I was regretting not joining that..hahas.

Current girls' team (minus Charis)

The usual team photo! (sadly minus the planking Jon Ma)

Right, I spotted the camera, must pose a bit ;)

NZ - Land of the Kiwis (25 Aug-31 Aug 2013)

Overdued post for my final trip as a student!!!

Solo travel

This trip was planned pretty last minute and tight, right after SIA accepted me as a Customer Affairs Manager, slotted in between ST Run in the Park and Army Half Marathon (which I was a pacer). I was scheduled to leave at 7pm on 25 August right after my competitive race and back 10pm Saturday night, which left me 5h to get home and get ready for AHM. Pretty rushed for Leon too as he had to drive 6h from Dunedin to Christchurch to pick me up and drive me to Dunedin and this holiday was in his midterm break.

Cute memory tree at T2!

This was actually my first time travelling ALONE, despite being a 23 year-old. It was quite exciting, I had no travelling companion and I was truly left to my own devices on the way to Christchurch. Whatever happened I had no one to blame except myself..Thank God nothing actually screwed up :) It was an expensive but quite comfortable flight - British Airways transit at Sydney and then a Quantas flight overnight on the 25 August. The flight was really comfortable, food was good and I actually watched a movie on the IFE - Nicholas Spark's Safe Haven, which was sweet.

Morning sky in Sydney

I was having mixed feelings seeing Leon - after not seeing him for almost 2 months and before that, our relationship was rather unstable as well. Nevertheless, I was excited to be in a foreign land on holiday (as usual!) and I was happy that I would not be alone on this trip.

Upon arrival, Leon was waiting for me with a bouquet of flowers, I could sense that he was really overjoyed to see me. It was a little awkward at first but it faded away and we were comfortably talking to each other. Then we embarked on our 6h drive back to Dunedin. Boy, it was really cold and I realised I was pretty much unprepared for the temperature because I packed light :O

The drive back was pretty scenic, the sun was setting, sun rays reflected on the rolling meadows and blue skies. Spotted cows, sheep and horses on the way as well. A reflection of a slow way of life totally different from the cities we Asians/Singaporeans are so used to. No wonder, people enjoy retiring in such a country.

Sunset at an isolated (freezing cold) coast

Cargo of sheep!

After a supermarket trip and a stop on an isolated coast on the way, we finally reached Dunedin, approximately 400km away from Christchurch, on the southern tip of South Island. The place he was staying at was 37A Leith Street, a stone's throw away from the Otago University that he was studying in.

Cosy huh?

That night after settling down in his quaint cosy house, we walked out to a nearby famous pizza joint Poppa's Pizza for dinner. He recommended that it was cheap so I was like ok, let's go then. It was quite old school, popular with students of the university and were also run by them (most shops were). We shared a seafood pizza, yummy and warm from the oven. It was pretty good, just a little overpriced (what isn't in NZ). The decor of the shop was quite interesting actually, with old posters of events organised by the university.

yumms..

Posters that decorated the wall

After dinner, we took a stroll around the neighbourhood and visited the supermarket (one of my favourite store because of all the yummy stuff). Some of the buildings at night were hauntingly beautiful. I wonder what lurks beneath... (One of the attractions in Dunedin was the ghost tours, which I was too frightened to go but I heard were pretty good)

Only doesn't look as scary with filter

See what I mean?

The next day, we woke up at 5.30am to try to catch sunrise at Mt Cargill (676m). What I did not realised that the drive up was pretty long, and I actually wanted to bike there (quite impossible). It was spectacular watching the dark sky become bright on top on a vantage point, and as if an invisible painter slowly streaks the skies pink, orange and blue, something you can only imagine in postcards. Spectacular. What is also different is that it is actually VERY COLD atop the mountain, and with the strong winds in Dunedin, the coldness seems magnified. I was FREEZING and I must say it wasn't easy taking photos because my hands were shaking and numbed.

Slowly rising

Love the effects!

Rolling down the slopes

After a magnificent sunrise, we drove back to take our bikes out for breakfast at the Good Earth Cafe near our place for a quaint special breakfast. He ordered blueberry bagel and latte (as per normal) and I got a cheese scone and espresso shot. YUM. It was hot and delicious although quite an expensive breakfast ($9 NZ) but it was worth the price. We left satiated and all ready for a bike ride to the beaches of Dunedin - St Clair's and St Kilda.

Cheese scone!

"still haven't woke up"

Store facade

We cycled past the Otago Railway Station, which was quite quaint and headed to St Clair's. It wasn't exactly a proper beach per say, more of seaside and pier. There were many gulls and pretty windy too, in fact, it was fun watching how the seagulls try to fly! St Clair's had a sign which pointed the distance and direction to the South Pole, which I found rather interesting. Next we cycled to St Kilda's, a distance away but also another beach, which was less 'visited'. We took off our shoes to walk on the smooth soft sand. Gosh, the water made the sand icy cold!

the railway station - design looks familiar to tokyo too!

St Clair's

still at St Clair's

St Kilda's - a bit on the wild side

captured a flying gull!

the sign i mentioned

empty beach!

After the beaches, we cycled back home and Leon drove us down to Otago Peninsula for afternoon's activities. It was rather scenic and we had a picnic lunch by the peninsula - sandwiches and fruits, made by me :)

Larnach Castle was next on our list. Although it was kind of costly ($28) for both the castle interior and grounds, it was worth it. We spent the afternoon exploring the only castle in New Zealand and despite it being small, I've never been to one before so I was pretty intrigued by even the idea of visiting one! It was built in 1871 by William Larnach of Scottish descent and I would think that it had certain features of Scottish castles. However, the family was embroiled in dispute after tragedy struck and the castle was privately sold off. The castle is rather well-maintained and the view of the sea was pretty :)

our picnic area

testing my camera

a gaggle of geese

#selca by the garden

Entrance of the castle

Rooftop view atop Larnach Castle

There was still some time after meeting a friendly Aussie man at the castle, whom we talked to for quite a while (beauty of travel to be able to form aquaintances), so we headed to Sandfly Bay to catch some sealion and maybe penguins aka hoihoi in Maori language (sadly we didn't). We met a huge flock of grazing sheep as well and they were quite amusing to chase. The sand dunes were HUGEEEE. I had to conquer my fear of heights to tread carefully down the sinking soft sand (and back up again>.<) in order to go down onto the beach but it was cool that I was rewarded with up-close-and-personal sessions with the sealions.

look at how low we went (the beach!)

having fun with capturing sheep

sealion! (only less than 5m away)

terribly high sand dunes :/

We concluded the day by heading over to Velvet Burger for 2-for-1 Tuesday deals (warning: huge burgers) and a stroll around the city centre. We also walked around the Otago University campus which was beautiful. Wished NUS was as scenic.

pink blossoms!and old architecture

doesn't look like a campus huh?

The next day, we got up early at about 5am to drive to Queenstown for our short ski vacation. It was a pretty cold drive..I was freezing in the car. So was Leon. I fell asleep most of the ride but at the later part, was awake to watch the sunrise :) And I must say, every sunrise and sunset in NZ is awesomeee and surreal!!Unfortunately, when we arrived at 9am, it starting drizzling and since we arrived too late for our skiing trip, (my quick thinking) we decided to shift skiing to the next day and luckily all our current plans had coupons that were flexible. Queenstown was nothing like what I imagined.It's practically in a valley (at least it feels like it..hahas) and all the buildings seems very flattened. Being a town for ski tourism, I didn't expect it to be so laidback and small.

Snapshot of queenstown

School kids having games

Our first attraction of Queenstown was the Skyline Gondola & Luge at Bob's Peak overlooking Lake Wakatipu. The attraction has various passes of different prices for the gondola and luge options. We took a gondola ticket and 4x luge. The view was stunning, by far the best and the luge was fun..a little scary and irritating because my eyes were so dry from the wind but nevertheless, good experience. There were 2 paths, basic and intermediate, so it's pretty friendly to scaredy-cats like me..hehes.

Thank goodness we reached the inn in time before the heavy downpour which carried on till dusk. Despite the wet weather, we decided to drop by Arrowtown, a small goldmining town near Queenstown. I wished it wasn't raining so I could explore the pretty and quaint place but the downpour didn't stop :( It's quite similar to Handoorf in Adelaide, and Kamakura in Tokyo, just much smaller, but I think more could be done to improve it.

Dreary weather..zzzz

After a walk around the town and visiting the old Chinese settlement, we returned to Queenstown and went to Steamers' Wharf with the intention for dinner. But too expensive so we headed to Fergburger, a must-try according to Baldwin :) I must say that the burgers are HUGE! But good choices they offer. We had the morning glory and it was quite delicious, especially in the cold weather.

Other interesting places to visit (and shop) would be CookieTime (a Famous-Amos-like shop) and The Remarkable Sweet Shop, which sells all kinds of sweets around the world that you can ever imagine, including rabbit candy!

Steamers' wharf

THe Remarkable Sweet Shop!!

We headed to the Icebar (paid about $13 for admission & drink) after dinner. It was an ice chamber where everything was made of ice, even our cups! Strangely, there isn't many people there and those who were there only stayed about 10min. We spent time playing table hockey and camwhoring at the photobooth..lols

We had some drinks coupon given by our hostel staff but I think we were too tired to barhop and after visiting the first bar for a free apple-cinnamon whisky, we headed back to sleep.

I must say, the dorm at Flaming Kiwi Backpackers was clean, neat and the beds were super comfortable :) It was indeed worth every cent, the bathroom was super duper clean and the lamp even provided some warmth when I was freezing my butt off. The dorm also had free entertainment, coffee/tea for the guests.

Ferburgers are HUGEEE

Icebar #everythingcool

making drinks

some great apple-cinnamon whisky

Drinks pass..sadly we were too tired to drink

We spent the second day of Queenstown practically skiing. But since that was much later in the day, we decided to go for a walk and headed to the lake. The morning chilly breeze was really refreshing and the sun rising view was really great. Thank God the weather was perfect for skiing, the sun prevented the mountains from being too chilly.

Next, we headed to the ski centre where the bus would pick us and send us to the Remarkables for a day of skiing! #exciteddd Anyways I felt that the skiing was well-organised in Queenstown because it is a skiing town and we only paid NZ120+ from the Queenstown ski website for 3hours of lessons for a basic skier. Skiing is NOT EASY but it totally tones all your muscle groups. At the end of the day I returned with a sore butt and quads. After much tumbling, crashing and screaming, my skiing improved and I daresay I can go down a kid's slope :) hahhahas..going down a slope is SCARYY..plus all the headwind..goshh..My worst accident was when I went down too fast and flew over a woman who had already have problems stopping..LOLS. but it has given me a badge of honour, a lump on my left leg which stayed till now -__-

Selca by the pretty lake..

sunrays reflecting off the mountain

never seen such snowcapped beauty - The Remarkables

Ski boots!

ski resort

one day..maybe..

We were pretty much exhausted from skiing but no choice, we had to return back home to Dunedin. Poor Leon had to drive us back in the evening and I actually slept most of the way. However, I must say that the evening scenery was really pretty :)

The last day spent was in Dunedin exploring what's left of the city. We woke up for a 8-10k hike up Signal Hill & run down Signal Hill to Dunedin Botanic Gardens and passed the cemetery. Pretty tiring run I must say..After the run, we spent some time making pancakes for breakfast! Cheap, hot and yummy :D After breakfast, we cycled down to Baldwin Street, the world's steepest street (and boy, was it terribly steep!).

Rewarding homemade pancake breakfast!!

Peak of Signal Hill

Hiking up Signal Hill is NO JOKE! 

#actcute

 After cycling back from Baldwin Street, we went to walk around the city centre, did some shopping and went to the Otago Museum. Like Adelaide, the museum was free and awfully cool! It has a living science/taxonomy gallery, maritime museum, ethnographic display, history...etc

Many fossils!

Then we headed to the Otago Art Gallery, which was pretty cool (and FOC)! The gallery had a mix of contemporary art, Asian art (Japanese, Buddhist) and many acquired paintings.

Hokusai's famous collection of the many images of Mt Fuji

Train Station

Pretty silhouette

Chinese gardens (not recommended because of high price)

We also wanted to head to the Settlers' Museum but too bad it closed :/ So we walked around the area near it.

Lastly we popped by the Cadbury Chocolate Factory just before it closed to get a peek at what was inside. The whole place was chocolate haven..Too bad we didn't have the time (and budget to go in for a visit) :/

Finally (and sadly), it was time to leave for Christchurch. We left at 1130pm from Dunedin for the long dark drive to the Christchurch airport. Leon was really sad to watch me go. I could see that in every way but I guess time really flies when you're having fun and everything has an end. My trip too..

yummy seafood meal onboard! 

Back to reality and warm sunny Singapore..